PUTTING HIS MONEY WHERE HIS MOUTH IS.......

You can certainly bank on the "Khiladi" (Akshay) Kumar to espouse or then promote the right cause every single time and do more than his bit towards alleviating the sufferings of his lesser privileged fellow Indians........
 Aggrieved; pained and deeply perturbed by the recent martyrdom of 19 gallant; indomitable and selfless army men: Akshay poured his heart out and castigated successive callous; apathetic and indifferent governments for brushing off their responsibility to the seemingly destitute families of these valiant martyrs by showering them with medals; chakras; bravery awards and a plethora of largely meaningless and intrinsically worthless platitudes.......
 Rajiv Hariom Bhatia (Akshay Kumar's real nom de guerre) was actively participating in a felicitation ceremony organised by a Mumbai based NGO on September 24;2016 and he more than backed up his words or utterances by not only loosening his purse strings for the umpteenth time and issuing a series of cheques to the war widows as well as other family members of the fallen soldiers out of his personal kitty........
 One may do well to remember the noteworthy and appreciable facts that Akshay has been the Hindi Film Industry's highest tax payer for the last seven to eight odd years and also doled out crores of rupees to long suffering and blighted Maharashtra farmers as well as scores of other such eponymous fellow Indians who had largely been leading a life of utter penury and extreme suffering.......

WHEN WILL OUR SCHOOLS FOLLOW SUIT........

Indian schools and teachers who steadfastly and resolutely believe that archaic; barbaric and inhuman torture and penal action is the only way of reforming or punishing errant children surely have a lot to learn from this Baltimore (United States Of America) based school..........
 Yes you did indeed read it right this Baltimore based school initiated or then pioneered a one of it's kind programme with effect from June 2016 onwards which entails replacing detested and abhorred detention with meditation and self realisation........
 Drawing inspiration from the various forms of meditation and self realisation propagated and practiced by the Art of Living and Osho (Acharya Rajneesh) Ashrams the Robert. W. Coleman Elementary School introduced or then incorporated a series of programmes and the results derived over the last three odd months have astounded and astonished every doubting Thomas and dyed in the wool skeptic.......
 Under the aegis of this dynamic and life altering pogrom every erring; disobedient and truculent pupil is ushered into the school's "Mindful Moment Room" a room or then vacant expanse of space adorned or embellished with serene and calming purple windows; Chinese and other paper lanterns and last but not the least wall hangings and such other decorations that have been created by the students themselves........
 In addition to the above; the afore mentioned school also offers a plethora of alternatives wherein the students can enroll themselves and practice a virtual encyclopedia of meditation;yoga and other such mind control exercises and mediums appropriately christened "Holistic Me" in conjunction with a local NGO whcih calls itself the Holistic Life Foundation.........
 One wonders when our schools; prison centres or torture/horror chambers (as yours truly prefers calling them) will take a leaf out of this emulatory school's illustrious and illuminating book and start following suit........

RAJU SHRIVASTAV SHOWS HOW IT'S DONE......

Now here is certainly one gent or then should I say comedian after my very own heart and soul........
 Veteran comedian par excellence Raju Shrivastav aka Gajodhar Chacha has steadfastly refused to travel to our neighbouring country Pakistan for a series of live shows slated to be held in various Pakistani cities in the wake of the recent dastardly terrorist attack on our soldiers in Uri.......
 Raju posted a video on you tube; instagram as well as various other social networking sites clearly elucidating or enunciating his reasons for having done so even if his actions cost him several lakh rupees and unequivocally stated the impressive and laudable fact that national prestige and honour was far more significant and important than the seventy five odd lakh rupees he would have netted in the bargain.......
 One only hopes and prays that other fellow performers and actors take a leaf out of Raju's eponymous book and follow in his illustrious footsteps and wake.......

INSTANT INFAME AND NOTORIETY......

Here is certainly one way or means of gaining instant infame; disrepute and notoriety........
 Veteran journalist and India Today news channel consul;ting editor who has drawn the constant or then I say consistent ire and vitriol of extreme right wing and divisive groups and formations as he summoned up the guts; gumption and temerity to show them their hideous and distorted face in the mirror found himself at the receiving end once again.......
 The only difference being that a largely unknown; nondescript and anonymous Odishan daily called Sambad splashed his visage across it's front page and branded him as one of the elusive six or so mysterious assailants whom the Mumbai police and other security agencies were looking for ever since two school going kids had spotted the very same bunch moving around with menacing looking guns some fifty or so kilometers from Mumbai two or three days ago.......
 Trust the irrepressible Mr. Sardesai to come up with a befitting riposte or rejoinder and he took to his twitter handle attributing the same malicious; irreverent and highly misleading as well as provocative propaganda to right wing activists who seem to have mastered the art of hitting below the belt every single time......
 Belatedly realising it's grave and eponymous error; the editor in chief of the said Odishan daily showed the grace and humility to issue an unconditional apology to the aggrieved party profusely apologising for the supposedly inadvertent and unintended error and to his credit Rajdeep preferred to let sleeping dogs lie and took the same in his inimitable stride with any further ado.......
Well; all's well that ends well in this case at least; but one hopes and prays that the powers that be within the hierarchy or annals of the Odishan daily in the spotlight realise the value of checking and cross checking or verifying their facts and sources before publishing such disparaging and damaging articles in the future.....

BITING OFF MORE THAN HE CAN CHEW.......

As a matter of principle yours truly is vehemently and inexorably opposed to internet trolls who have made it their self appointed business to chastise; lampoon and lambast practically any and every comment made on twitter and such other social networking mediums.......
 Circumstances; effrontery of comment; it's emotive appeal and last but not the least expressed desire and motive behind the same determine my stance on this seemingly vexatious and controversial issue every single time and it is no different this time around.......
 One may do well to remember the indisputable and irrefutable fact that I have steadfastly stood by stormy petrel Gautam Gambhir's seemingly controversial and stormy comments in the past but even and avowed and committed supporter like moi more than disagrees with Gambhir's expressed sentiments this time......
 Mr. Gambhir took to his twitter handle and penned the following comment on the Uri martyrs (19 gallant and selfless army men who laid down their lives in the cause of the country) pertaining to these martyrs being the subject matter of a series of planned/forthcoming biopics rather than cricketers/fellow sportsemen or celebrities who had done precious little if anything for the cause of mother India........
 Trollers who seemed to be awaiting their latest victim or then object of their collective ire wasted no time whatsoever in cutting Gambhir down to size and questioned his sagacity; sincerity; emotional depths and the like by raising umpteen or then a plethora of questions about the timing and appropriateness of Gambhir's expressed comments in this regard.......
 Live and let live has always been my ruling dictum during the course of my 47 year long on planet earth; but even I for one feel that Gautam has bitten off more than he could chew this time around and should have weighed or then considered his words far more diligently and painstakingly before committing them to his twitter handle.......

SIDHU QUITS KAPIL SHARMA'S SHOW FOR GOOD.......

Thank the good lord for his tender mercies; benevolence; munificence and good grace.......
 Erstwhile cricketer par excellence Navjot Singh (Sixer) Sidhu has at long last decided to pack his bags and quit the so called comic show helmed by the infamous and disreputable Kapil Sharma with effect from the end of September 2016.......
 More than confirming the news; Mr. Sidhu's better half clearly and unequivocally elucidated or enunciated the indisputable fact that her seemingly larger than life spouse has indeed called it quits and upheld his professional commitments by willingly agreeing to shoot the last episode that he will be prominently featuring in on September 30; 2016........
 Sidhu who had recently launched the Awaaz-E-Punjab Morcha in tandem with former Indian hockey captain Pargat Singh and such notable others will henceforth be focusing his energies and time solely on ushering in the land of five rivers "Golden Era" and restoring it's supposedly lost glory......
 Well; what else can one say apart from quipping that Kapil's loss is more than surely Punjab's gain and hoping and praying that the state makes more than optimum use of "Sixer" Sidhu's avowed aims and publicly expressed intentions.......

NEW DELHI'S MUCH ADMIRED "RASOI ON WHEELS".........

One has always heard of philanthropists; good samaritans as well as well meaning folks pooling their resources and feeding impoverished as well as lesser privileged folks with left overs as well as "excess" food left over after satiating the appetites and cravings of self styled gourmets; but this national capital based "Rasoi" is certainly a new one even for a jaded and world weary soul like moi........
 New Delhi's newest "pride and joy" "Rasoi on Wheels" a ubiquitous and nondescript white CNG powered Tata Ace tempo or van (as you prefer to term it) has now been dishing out more than 30,000 sumptuous and freshly cooked meals to the national capital's homeless and lesser mortals who cannot stop thinking it's initiators/ movers and shakers.......
 A random and casual conversation between Atul Kapur and his two other comrades in arms (co-owners of the famed Connaught Place based QBA restaurant) literally set the wheels in motion and this now famed and literally worshipped "Rasoi on Wheels" dished out a more than impressive 11,000 odd piping hot; sumptuous and gratifying meals during the fateful month of July 2016.......
 Currently in it's third month of operations; this first of it's kind welcome and much desired initiative now dishes out a jaw dropping 30,000 plus meals twice a day come rain; shine; hell or high water and is nurtured; supported; galvanised; motored and powered by more than 80 similarly inclined folks and bleeding hearts who have come together to add further impetus to this budding revolution........
 Apart from dishing out eternal favorites like Rajma Chawal; Kadi Chawal; Chholey Chawal; Vegetable Noodles; Chowmein; Gobi/Panneer Manchurian/Veg Fied Rice and last but not the least Shahi Panneer Chawal; Papads; Achar and a soft drink for company mostly from the hallowed precincts of a 900 odd foot CP based base kitchen; this "Rasoi" with a difference also dishes out all these above mentioned combos as well as a few more to those folks who can afford to pay for the same at extremely pocket friendly prices varying between Rs. 35-65 depending on the combination as well as size of the meal that is attractively and alluringly packaged and marketed........
 As Kapur quips; the returns from the same enterprise only serve to keep the wheels in motion and provide us with the ways and means of feeding more and more hungry mouths with every passing day; week and month or then father time who rests for no mortal.......
 Kapur and friends sign off by doling up this priceless dollop of wisdom and humanity about "Giving not making anyone poor and leading to their ruin" ; more power to their elbow I say and for fellow Dilliwalas and Waalis whatever on earth are you waiting for do step forward and be a part of this epic revolution or better still start a similar venture of your very own and do one better.......

MOVING AND BEFITTING FAREWELL.......

I for one can more than vouch for the heart wrenching fact that losing a pet is indeed one of the most poignant and nerve wracking experiences that one can experience as I have loved and lost more than a couple of them........
 Madhya Pradesh's Namdarpura Village underwent a similar experience on the fateful day of September 22 when the collective apple of every villager's eye Kalu (village's dearer than life pet dog) drew his last breath and departed the land of the living.......
 Kalu had been a more than integral part and parcel of the 3,000 odd inhabitants of this ubiquitous and hitherto anonymous village for the last 17 odd years according to a tearful and seemingly inconsolable resident and hence the entire village decided to accord the object of their desire a befitting farewell.......
 A tempo was hired to transport Kalu's mortal remains to his final resting place and the flower bedecked cortege was dutifully followed by every resident of the afore mentioned village as well as equally distressed and dismayed residents of a few neighbouring villages as well......
 Led by a reputed and famous local band who played mournful and tear wrenching tunes all through the three odd kilometer journey Kalu was finally laid to rest in a freshly excavated grave and a marble slab bearing his photo date of birth and death was erected at the spot to immortalise his eventful and remarkable life and times........
 How one wishes and prays that a callous; uncaring; apathetic and cadaverous or then should I say system; state governments; government officials and medical authorities accorded the same respect to recently departed fellow human beings and lesser mortals........

HUBBALI'S INFAMOUS AND NOTORIOUS "HIGHWAYS TO HELL".......

Messrs Siddaramaiah; cronies; cohorts; chamchas; apologists; acolytes; hangers on; bureaucrats; town planners and last but not the least uncaring and apathetic bureaucrats are you listening......
 As if Bengaluru's famed/notorious/nightmarish and deathly potholes were not the bane of every residents existence; Hubbali's hitherto largely anonymous and obscure potholes have done on better.......
 Believe it or not; 26 year old Parveenabanu.N. a life long Hubbali resident and a mother of two young bonny and bubbling girls delivered her third progeny within the confines of the auto rickshaw in which she was traversing the three odd kilometer expanse between her nondescript Anand Nagar abode and a state government run maternity home.......
 A heavily pregnant Parveena and her middle aged mother embarked upon the arduous and life altering journey at around 11:45 am or so on the fateful and eventful September 18 morning as the 26 year old was in her third trimester and her due delivery date was a mere three or so days away........
 Lo and behold!!!! Parveena who was yet to experience any labour pains or birthing pangs before she set foot within the said auto was wonderstruck and dismayed in equal measure when she found her third offspring's miniscule head popping out of her womb as soon as her chosen mode of conveyance ingloriously bumped over a rather menacing looking and forbidding pothole.......
 Fearful of her little bundle of joy's as well as her continued existence on planet earth; Parveena's alarmed and wailing mother started started berating the harried and harangued auto driver and ordering him to drive as fast as he humanly could so that they could reach their planned destination that was a good one and a half or so kilometers away post haste........
 Constrained and prohibited by the pock marked or then should I say potholed ridden hellish road (the same had not been asphalted for more than four years) the more than willing auto driver tried his utmost to comply with the ageing lady's implorings but simply could not comply with her frantic urgings........
 Deciding to take matters into her own more than capable hands; Parveena's gallant and indomitable mother duly proceeded to firstly cover or mask the auto's solitary entrance with a more than handy bedsheet and more than adroitly delivered her daughter's third offspring (who also happened to be a girl) with two women passing by more than capably assisting her in her labours.......
 Jaako Raakhe Saiyaan Maar Sake Na Koye and this age old dictum more than held true for the doughty mother and priceless offspring as they somehow or the other managed to reach the afore mentioned maternity centre with the umbilical cord still attached to the little one who had somewhat unceremoniously popped out of her mother's womb when least expected.......
 Both the mother and daughter are more than capably recovering from the travails and tortures inflicted on them by a government and callous and indifferent system that is incapable of asphalting or then carrying out the long overdue overhaul of one of Hubbali's numerous roads that are nothing short of the proverbial "highways to hell and beyond"........

WHOEVER NEEDS ENEMIES AND FOES......

I for one can more than vouch for the irrefutable fact that I have most certainly not heard of a more devilish and demonic father in the recent past.......
 A Palam (national capital based locality) based young girl who reached home a mere forty five minutes or so after her appointed curfew time after a visit to her maternal aunt's Raj Nagar based abode was subjected to the most heinous and diabolical form of punishment by her fugitive father a week or so back........
 According to the written complaint filed by her distraught and disbelieving mother at the Palam police station the young woman's father who was incensed and infuriated beyond all human limits set upon her with a vengeance as soon as she set foot through the door of her afore mentioned modest dwelling on the fateful September 11 night brandishing a menacing looking knife and mercifully stabbing her repeatedly before his maniacal fury dissipated somewhat........
 Thank the good lord for his tender mercies as he fled the crime scene after locking and securing the front door and leaving his not so mortally wounded daughter behind to fend for herself and tend to the innumerable though shallow injuries inflicted upon her by the very same man who sired her........
 She was locked up within the dark; desultory and claustrophobic confines of her solitary prison for the next five days or so before she somehow managed to make good her escape through a ventilator through which she somehow or the other managed to squeeze through with the greatest of difficulty........
 A dumbstruck and disbelieving neighbour who chanced upon her in this pitiful and disheveled state firstly proceeded to inform her mother who was the family's sole bread winner and had been residing at the garment factory where she was employed for the last week or so as she was performing two eight hour back to back shifts in an order to supplement her paltry and meagre income......
 The trio then proceeded to file the said complaint against the absconding father against whom the police sleuths lodged attempt to murder; wrongful confinement as well as intent to cause grievous harm cases and launched the now stereotyped and much abused "manhunt" in their umpteenth farcical and comic attempt to nab an accused at the earliest........
 With sorry apologies for fathers like this abounding the entire expanse of planet earth whoever needs enemies and foes.......

PROVING MYSELF AND MAKING MY MARK........

Life; fate; destiny; karma; kismet or whatever else you decide to christen; label or title it does indeed have this uncanny and unerring ability of kicking you in your face whenever you envisage your life to be the proverbial "Bed Of Roses" (whatever that means)........
 Pardon me for sounding dramatic; overwrought or hysterical but then an impoverished; literally penniless and seemingly destitute person like yours truly who is literally searching heaven an earth for any and every job that can enable him to keep his body and soul together and more significantly stop being and undue burden on his rapidly ageing mother does indeed have the right to pour out his litany of woes and frustrations.......
 Can anything on earth be more ironical; rhetorical or unintentionally hilarious than a situation; scenario or predicament wherein folks who you hold in high esteem and literally place on a pedestal question your faithfulness; integrity; honesty; sense of purpose or commitment to remaining within Bangalore's territorial limits or boundaries as the same forbids them from recommending your name/candidature for jobs that they claim they can land or then place you in within the batting or the proverbial eyelid.......
Let me once again reiterate or underline the irrefutable fact that I have indeed burned my bridges with/in Hyderabad despite having lived there for the last twelve (12) odd years and even grown roots in the "city of Nizams; pearls; ubiquitous Paradise or then Hyderabad House; Bawarchi Biryani; Haleem and last but not the least Bade Miyaan's famed and succulent Paththar Gosht that is worth every single mile you traverse in your fill of the same"........
Yours truly set foot In the city where he grew up and came to love beyond life itself on August 17; 2016 and has since approached everybody he could imagine or then envisage as a source/medium in his quest for a means of livelihood commensurate with his varied and multitudinous experiences acquired rather painstakingly and meticulously over the course of the last 24 or so years of holding various positions no matter however meaningless/inane or trivial they may be in the eyes of the rest of the world.......
 Yes; I am old fashioned; decrepit; ancient; fossilised; a relic from the past and so on and so forth; but then my belief about humans and humanity prevailing over and and every material pursuit and acquisition has been the sum total of my forty seven (47) odd year long chequered though highly eventful existence on planet earth and I am neither willing to compromise; alter or even budge an iota from the same no matter what........
 Twitter; instagram; whatsapp; you tube and every other new social networking site; tool; device and yours truly are complete strangers and I am utterly unapologetic about the irrefutable and indisputable fact that I neither take recourse to any of these mediums and am more than comfortable in my skin and facebook where I have been for the last seven odd years or so.......
 If you are condescending and gracious enough to accept me as I am warts; blemishes; grey hair; eccentricities; quirks; quaint mannerisms et al; do offer me any job that can help me keep my body and soul together ( hell I am ready to start working with any individual who can offer me a starting salary or remuneration in the vicinity of Rs.32-35,000) from this very instant onwards........
 Content; blog; article; feature; middle; press handouts; publicity material; HR handbooks; appointment letters and so on and so forth (drafting; writing; editing; designing etc) is what I am best at so do feel free to contact me either through my facebook page; blogs that I post under the acronym/assumed name of "sandythevirgo"; e-mail me at-chopra.sood@gmail.com or then call me up on 7338458228 ASAP..........
 Please guys and gals I need a job/assignment like a hungry and starving soul needs his next meal so do accord me with an opportunity of proving myself and making my mark.........

NO HOLDS BARRED ACCOUNT.......

Firstly kindly accept my sincere and heartfelt apologies for my enforced absence from my beloved and revered facebook page for the last ten days or so for a plethora of reasons beyond my control and means........
 As they say; every dark cloud does indeed have a silver lining and the same holds true in my case too as I was accorded with the opportunity of visiting my dearer than life Maasi (Neelu Didi) who is dearer and far more precious to me than life itself and her earthy wisdom and sagely benedictions more than helped me take stock of my rather piquant predicament and make a muster of the rest of my life on planet earth.........
While there is no disputing the fact that I completely and utterly failed in my primary objective of either procuring or then landing a job in a city that is extremely close to my heart during the course of my six day long stay in this rather troubled; turbulent and tortured city; my visits to the Shirdi Waaley Sai Baba temples in Vontikoppal and Pandavapura provided me with a god send opportunity of looking within and only served to reinforce or fortify my redoubtable sense of self belief and if anything only quadrupled my avowed purpose of making something of my life and leaving behind my indelible and unique imprints on the sands of time.......
 The age old; respected; revered and pious Saint Anthony Shrine located some seventy or so kilometres away from Mysore more than welcomed moi with open arms and mercifully embraced me within it's pervading sense/spirit of piety; devoutness; holiness; reverence; religiousness and enlightenment; the three odd hours I spent exploring or rather uncovering hitherto unknown or then uncovered facets of my persona only served to make a far more forgiving; accepting and non judgemental human being who has finally learnt to let go and stop brooding over so called failures and disappointments both perceived and real.........
Last but not the least; I viewed or then witnessed an unparalleled and incomparable cinematic saga or then event titled "PINK"; a cinematic masterpiece that is not to be missed by every self respecting; right and progressive thinking fellow Indian who believes in and respects the right of individual choice; freedom and above all the indisputable and irrefutable fact that a woman does indeed mean "NO" every single time she utters the word either at the top of her voice or then in a firm and unapologetic manner so that the receiver gets the message unequivocally and unfailingly/unerringly every single time.........
 Hell; if yours truly was well and truly bestowed with the power and discretion of bestowing or then conferring the much coveted National Awards; I would confer the same on the living legend Amitabh Bachchan and up and coming actress Taapsee Pannu as their stellar performances in this once in a generation cinematic experience are nothing short of masterful and thoroughly deserving of any and every conceivable as well as inconceivable cinematic plaudit........
 Well; here is a no holds barred account of the last ten odd days of my life (for whatever it is worth) and may I care to enquire about what the rest of you did with the last ten or so days of your life and times........

PROMPT AND TIMELY DISCIPLINARY ACTION.......

It is indeed most heartening and gratifying to note the welcome fact that at long last here is a responsible and conscientious minister and group of babu's (railway officials/bureaucrats) who promptly react to tweets/complaints registered by distressed travellers who commute by long as well as local trains and frequently bear the brunt of corrupt and usurpious officials errant and criminal ways/tendencies.......
One such ubiquitous and stereotypical 28 year old passenger (Govind) who was traversing the stretch/expanse between Barmer and Kalka on the fateful and eventful Sunday afternoon happened to chance upon the Travelling Ticket Examiner exhorting sums of money varying between a pithy Rs.20 and a significant Rs. 200/- on the pretext of allotting berths to commuters (depending upon the distance travelled by each one of them) and pocketing the sums without issuing an official receipt for the same........
 Govind who was well acquainted with the prevalent and existing systems demanded an official receipt as was his right after handing over the demanded sum of Rs. 200 only to be brusquely and cursorily brushed off with the laconic response that the same will be duly handed over before he alighted from the train at his ultimate destination........
 Deciding to take matters into his own more than capable hands Govind who was more than aware of the prevalent system of sending SMS's/tweets to the conscientious and caring railway minister; citizen friendly prime minister and Divisional Railway Manager (Jodhpur) promptly whipped out his high end mobile handset and sent out a series of tweets to the afore mentioned notables that bore a result that he could not envisage even in his most outlandish dreams........
 Govind and his co-passengers who were at the receiving end of the said TTE's grubby and conniving ways were elated and euphoric when the offending railway functionary was curtly ordered to disembark from the train at the Merta Railway station and his replacement set vexatious matters/issues right by promptly issuing receipts to all concerned and allotting them their promised berths.........
This 28 year old crusader who took up cudgels on behalf of his fellow travellers/passengers cannot stop gushing about the promptness and timeliness of the disciplinary action/measures initiated against the corrupt and malicious TTE and has sworn to repeat this trend whenever he sees any wrongdoing while travelling on a train of his choosing.........

TRANQUIL AND SERENE EXISTENCE ALTERED FOREVER......

A sinister crime and murder most foul vitiated and polluted the largely tranquil and serene existence of Dehradun's residents on a typically balmy September Monday evening.......
 A group of teens aged between 12 and 15 who were prancing and gallivanting around with a football for company were startled out of their collective wits when they heard a women's hideous and plaintive cries for help some distance away from the spot where they were indulging in a spot of football.......
 Though a significant majority of the fifteen or so teens who were enjoying themselves expressed their sense of reluctance and recalcitrance in rushing to the distressed woman's aid and rescue; five daring and concerned youths broke away from the larger gaggle and bravely ventured towards the spot (Mohabbewala jungle area on the iconic city's outskirts) only to be confronted with a macabre sight that will continue to haunt them for years to come.........
 They (the youths who rushed to the rescue of the woman in peril) stumbled upon the corpse of a semi clad woman who prima facie seemed to be in her mid to late thirties (according to police sleuths) and a yet to be identified gent fleeing the crime scene post haste........
 Their innate and natural sense of curiosity and wonderment got the better of them and they firstly tried their utmost to stir the deceased woman who did not respond to their ministrations and also inadvertently stumbled upon a brown bag that contained a bottle of acid as well as a five or so litre can of petrol within it's fold........
 Dismayed and alarmed beyond all reasonable belief all the teens/boys made an abrupt beeline towards their homes located within the perimeter of the adjoining Patel Nagar area and blurted out the news about their ghastly discovery to their initially disbelieving and incredulous parents who subsequently proceeded to inform the local police station about the discovery of the woman's body........
Police officials who rushed to the murder scene with two of the teens as well as their parents as guides also managed to recover a ramshackle bicycle from the scene in addition to the afore mentioned brown bag........
 A senior inspector who led the police team conjured up an initial hypothesis about the yet to be identified victim as well as her assailant could be labourers from another state employed at a nearby construction site and the murder most foul could be a consequence of a bitter and acrimonious falling out between the two of them.......
 Photographs of the dead woman as well as an identity sketch of the suspected murderer are being circulated widely amongst all the police stations spread over a radius of a hundred odd kilometres in an effort to identify the murderer as well as his unsuspecting and gullible victim........

PRAVEEN KUMAR TO TRY HIS LUCK IN THE POLITICAL ARENA.......

Former Indian medium pacer Praveen Kumar has now decided to try his fate and fortune at the political hustings after formally joining the ruling Samajwadi Party on Sunday afternoon.......
 29 year old Praveen who has not found favour with the national selectors for the last three seasons and more after a series of seemingly career threatening injuries and has since been plying his trade for his states (Uttar Pradesh's) Ranji Trophy as well as recently launched Gujarat Lions Indian Premier League team was formally admitted into the political party of his choosing by none other than the incumbent chief minister Akhilesh Yadav.......
 Meerut based Kumar who originally hails from an illustrious and decorated family of wrestlers is likely to be fielded as the party's candidate from one of the assembly constituencies in his pocket borough during the forthcoming 2017 assembly elections as Samajwadi Party bigwigs are of the considered opinion that this current cricketer turned politician stands a more than even chance of emerging triumphant at the electoral hustings.......
 Kumar will juggle both careers (cricketing as well as political) simultaneously a la his more illustrious and iconic former captain and fellow cricketer Mohammad Kaif who has been actively associated with the Indian National Congress since 2014 when he unsuccessfully contested the then national elections/polls from the state's Phulpur Lok Sabha constituency and came a cropper......
PRAVEEN  Here's wishing Praveen unprecedented success in his second innings or rather coming as a politician and hoping that he selflessly and conscientiously serves the folks inundating his prospective constituency rather than solely fixing his attention on filling his coffers and bank accounts like a significant majority of all present day politicians........

AS BIZARRE AS IT CAN GET......

In an uncanny and bizarre reprisal or reenactment of Kolkata's infamous and scandalous Robinson Street incident in which a 45 year old man was found cohabiting in a sprawling residence with the skeletal remains of his long deceased sister and two pet dogs in June 2015; here comes the news of two middle aged or then should I say elderly gents merrily coexisting with the skeleton of their dearest mother who breathed her last some nine or so months back..........
 Local police sleuths who stormed into the somewhat desolate and largely isolated residential site on a fateful and Sunday evening after being apprised of the fellow residents suspicions about the mysteriously missing mater of 65 year old Arun Saha and his younger sibling 55 year old Ajit Saha were rather taken aback and shocked out of their collective wits when they discovered the skeletal remains of the 85 year old woman in question and her two sons living in unfathomable squalor; waste; filth and abject poverty........
 On being queried/interrogated by a senior inspector at length; the brothers took turns to narrate the rather bizarre and macabre saga of their beloved 85 year old mother breathing her last on a particularly bone chilling January 15 2016 late night and they in their collective wisdom decided to hang on to her mortal remains as it was a little too cold for comfort to venture outside the seemingly warm and salubrious confines of their ancestral home.........
 They then duly proceeded to apprise the disbelieving and incredulous police team about the fact that they ultimately arrived at a consensus to perform their mother's last rites in the month of April 2016 when a typically scorching Kolkata summer had set in but were dissuaded by the emaciated and largely reduced mass of skins and bones which had been feasted upon by maggots and the likes who had made their home and hearth in every crevice and orifice of the corpse........
 Fellow residents of the area in question grew suspicious and wary when every query pertaining to the much admired and respected Nani Bala Saha a lifelong resident of Nadia district's Simhat locality was met with a rather curt response and infuriating rebuke that rose their hackles every single time........
 Matters came to a head on the afore mentioned Sunday late afternoon when concerned residents decided to take matters into their own hands and unceremoniously stormed (along with the local police team in tow) into the largely neglected and uncared for house which was located a considerable distance away from the main road only to be confronted with a horrendous site which will give them nightmares and horrors for as long as they live........
 As for the two siblings who were unemployed for the last two decades and more and led a rather measly hand to mouth existence they have been admitted to a state run mental health institution where a team of doctors are carrying out a series of tests in order to determine their mental capacities and sanity........

DASTOOR IBADAT KAA DUNIYAA SE NIRAALA HO........

Different strokes for different folks as diversity; divergence; plurality and diversity is what indeed makes this universe spin on it's axis.......
 While traditionalists and conformists swear by the centuries old practices and rituals of propitiating and currying favour with their beloved "Elephant God" (Lord Ganesha) with modaks; puranpolis; obbatus; ladoos; and last but not the least a mind boggling and tantalising plethora of kosambir's; here is a village in Karnataka's Koppal district that begs to differ.......
 Residents of Koppal districts truly "different an unique" Bhagyanagar village make a more than earnest and devout effort to please or the gratify their favoured lord and deity with overflowing and burgeoning offerings of both cooked as well as raw chicken; beer; rum; whisky and every other conceivable form of liquor on the third day of the ten day long festival that is celebrated in vast tracts of this age old nation.......
 According to the headman of this largely anonymous and stereo typically sleepy hamlet that has abruptly come into the limelight and been accorded celebrity status their (villagers) forefathers or ancestors started or then initiated this rather "hatke" ritual more than two hundred or so years back and their descendants or progeny have found no earthly or then outworldly reason to discontinue this age old practice.......
 Elaborating further or then adding his own two bits of seemingly infallible logic or earthy wisdom a toothless and wizened village elder quips that the "mover and shaker" of the world has neither expressed his displeasure or sense of outrage at the offerings made to him by the indebted three odd thousand inhabitants of the village in question and hence they see no rhyme or reason to change or alter these unique customs that may end up causing volcanic eruptions of hypocritical and hysterical proportions amongst the ranks of the self appointed guardians of all matters associated with the Hindu religion........
 If anything it only gets better from hereon as families that offer chicken and a bottle of rum on day three do one better and offer mutton and premium whisky brands on day four and last but not the least fish; prawns and every other imaginable or conceivable variety of sea food and bottles of exorbitantly priced Indian Made Foreign Liquor (IMFL) on day five apart from the litres of milk; coconut water and other condiments that are continually showered on the lord within each household that can afford to do the same........
 Let me clarify or then clear the resultant misconception that could arise about the same practices being followed or then observed at pandals raised in public spaces or common areas as the afore mentioned rather eccentric systems are strictly observed within the hallowed precincts of the very same households who have been doing the same unfailingly year after year........
 All I can say in conclusion is more power to the elbow of these humble; ubiquitous and naive village folks who are the living embodiments of the mellifluous words in the ghazal that goes something like this "Dastoor Ibadat Ka Duniyaa Se Niraala Ho; Ik Haath Main Maala Ho; Ik Haath Main Pyala Ho".........

TIME TO TAKE THE BULL BY IT'S HORNS........

When will the plethora of senas; dals; sabhas; samitis; and others of their ilk that have inundated this world with repugnant rhetoric; unbridled hate and blatant racism grow up and get a life......
 A hitherto obscure; seemingly anonymous and largely nondescript self appointed; anointed and appropriated guardian of so called Hindu values; ethics; morals and propriety that calls itself the "Hindu Sena" and claims that it's national headquarters are based in a predominantly lower middle class seems hell bent upon wreaking havoc with it's inadvertently hilarious and howlarious antics...... In an official written complaint lodged with the authorities at the national capital's Patparganj police station on Saturday afternoon alleging or then alluding to the sordid fact that a satirical 16 minute short feature film titled "Mama's Boys" co starring the supremely talented and multi faceted actresses Neena Gupta and Aditi Rao Hydari has irreparably hurt Hindu sentiments and "slighted" the entire community as a whole by portraying it's lead actors as homosexuals (according to their jaundiced; prejudiced; biased and bizarre opinion).........
 Let me state that I have viewed this film on you tube and applauded the guts; gumption; daring and gallantry of the director to not only poke fun at the largely masochistic; misogynistic; patriarchal; patronising and discriminating Hinud Samaj but also stirred the proverbial hornet's nest by making an earnest effort to question why Draupadi had to suffer the ignominy and agony of being married off to her five husbands without either her consent or expressed willingness........
 If anything I firmly believe that the shoe should be on the other foot and the concerned courts should take suo motu cognisance of this nonsensical and meaningless complaint filed before the overworked and overwrought Delhi Police and literally haul the chief and other office bearers of this militant outfit over the coals thereby sending out an unequivocal and unapologetic stance that such nonsense and blatant repression of the right to freedom of expression enshrined and guaranteed by the Indian constitution is not trampled and transgressed upon by every Tom; Dick and Harry who knows no better........
Let me also take this opportunity of stating the irrefutable fact that I am a more than proud and conscientious Hindu who steadfastly believes that "humanity" is the only true religion and that people who do not have an iota of the same within their heart and souls have no right whatsoever to question anybody else's beliefs; interpretations; derivatives and above all place the same before the public without either pulling their punches or mincing their words.......

TWO DOWN; MANY MORE TO GO/COME.......

Better late than never; the mandarins; bigwigs; powers that be within the corridors of the much maligned and defamed Information and Broadcasting Ministry have at long last woken up from their centuries of self imposed slumber and procrastination and initiated the first seemingly hesitant and "babyish" steps to curb the menace of piracy that has been the bane of every single film industry's existence.......
 Udta Punjab; Manjhi-The Mountain Man; Great Grand Mastii; Parched; Kaun Kitne Paani Main and the list goes on and on; are but just a few films that have been the targets of this bunch of lowlifes; charlatans; rascals or then any other name you can think of........
 Producers; Directors; Exhibitors; Distributors; Heroes; Heroines; Character/Supporting Actors et al have been crying themselves hoarse and repeatedly knocking at the doors of the nodal ministry armed with the powers to initiate punitive and definitive action against this wanton and willful criminality and mayhem and one can certainly thank the good lord for tender mercies as the ministry mandarins seem to have come to their senses and started doing their bit towards ridding the film industry/ies of this endless/ceaseless menace.......
 Vivek Oberoi; one of the leading men/male actors/triumvirate of heroes featuring in the afore mentioned "Great Grand Mastii" inadvertently let the cat out of the bag when he recently put out a series of tweets celebrating or then prominently highlighting the fact that the tweets that he had addressed to the minister of state (I and B) Rajyavardhan Singh Rathore at 10:30 pm or so a couple of days before the release of the Indra Kumar helmed multi starrer had finally borne fruit as the conscientious and concerned minister had taken due cognisance of his expressed concerns and posted a series of answers pertaining to the same on the intervening night of September 8-9.........
 A gushing; ebullient and effervescent Mr. Oberoi who was requested to fly down to the national capital and have a one to one meeting with the concerned minister on the fateful morning of September 9 duly did so in the august company of Messrs Jitendra; Ashok Tahkeria as well as Sameer Nair (CEO of Balaji Telefilms) and a marathon two and a half hour long meeting between the foursome and ace shooter turned minister yielded the following cognitive;cogent and far reaching results.......
 Two literally path breaking orders/measures were issued/initiated as soon as this result oriented meeting concluded; the first being the origination of a "John Doe" Act under which both the Delhi as well as police forces belonging to other states and union territories were bestowed or then conferred with the right to arrest or then apprehend persons at whom the needle of suspicion pointed at even though their identities and visages were masked and obscured.........
 Secondly all mobile telephone networks (Airtel; Idea; Reliance; Vodafone; Aircel; Reliance; BSNL and so on and so forth) were asked to comply with the letter and spirit of an "intermediary suit" which expressly forbid them and sternly warned them against either carrying clips or excerpts of all forthcoming releases and imperiously ordered to put in place a series of concrete and conclusive measures in order to ensure that these clips were never ever aired or then screened on their networks either by hook or by crook........
While Vivek bemoaned the fact that these much required measures had come a little too late in the day to salvage the dismal and piteous fate of his last release he graciously lauded the minister and "Babus" associated with the ministry for putting in place a mechanism that would go a long way towards ridding the beleaguered film industries from the scourge of rampant and all pervasive piracy that had been plaguing any and every conceivable film industry worth it's salt for the last two decades or so.......
 "Two down; many more to go/come"; Mr. Oberoi's last tweet on this vexatious issue read and I for one completely concur with his expressed views.......

ON COCKING A SNOOK AT ONLINE PIRACY.......

Bandits; thieves; unscrupulous and other equally perverted and debauched folks seem to have perfected the nefarious art of clandestinely downloading film clips; yet to be released feature films in their entirety and making tons of moolah through the same.......
 Udta Punjab; Baar Baar Dekho; Raman Raghav 2.0 and a few other such notables bit the dust and saw their box office collections plummet and plunge as a result of this deplorable and utterly despicable online piracy that makes a mockery of the years of hard work; sweat; toil; perseverance; blood and tears put in by an entire film unit in an earnest and laudable effort to see their "labour of love" onscreen.......
 "Parched" an offbeat; moderately budgeted and so called "niche" film which has been making the rounds of numerous international film festivals for the last few months and garnering critical acclaim as well as plaudits by the bucketful is the latest target of these debased online pirates and a two odd minute rather graphic love making scene between the lead pair of the flick newbie Adil Hussain and actress par excellence Radhika Apte is being shamelessly and unabashedly peddled as the latest "porn" sensation in every conceivable Kolkata market........
 According to sources close to or then intimately associated with this critically acclaimed and internationally lauded/applauded film with a "heart and soul"; so called "high quality" DVD's of the same are available for the ludicrous and jaw dropping price of Rs. 90/- each in scores of these hovels which pass of for video parlours and the likes in Didi's Kolkata and the now "iconic" and much publicised love making scene is being touted as the film's USP........
 Though "Parched" was made on a seemingly modest and seemingly unremarkable budget of Rs 19 crore or so and the producers have already recovered the same by peddling the plethora of rights (video; audio; internet and so on and so forth); I for one not only outrightly condemn and deprecate the unforgivable acts of these online pirates who seem hell bent upon driving the last nail into the coffin of various film industries reeling under losses running into hundreds of crores thanks to the mindless and utterly distasteful acts of these conscienceless and unrepentant desperadoes and strongly urge and implore all right minded and thinking fellow Indians to shun and abhor such pirated and duplicated versions of films and either view the same in their favourite multiplexes; single screen cinemas or then grab their DVD's; VCD's and Blu Ray discs when the official versions of the same are available at a store near you or online shopping sites such as Amazon; Flipkart and so on........
 I can only tout my very own example; hold my hand to/on my heart and proudly say that I have never promoted piracy and will never do so till my dying breath as I deeply respect and admire the admirable and laudatory efforts being made by our various film industries and therefore implore and beseech you to do the same.........
"Parched" hits screens nationwide on September 23; so kindly join me in viewing the same at my favourite multiplex thereby putting paid to the satanic deeds of these online vagabonds and showing them their rightful places in the entire scheme of film related issues (releases and the like)....... 

DELHI INDIA-NEW ZEALAND ODI POSTPONED BY A DAY........

One has heard of an umpteen number of bilateral cricket matches being postponed for the most outlandish and bizarre reasons but this one is an entirely new one for a jaded; world weary and cantankerous soul like yours truly........
 Top ranking or then should I say highly placed Delhi and District Cricket Association on Thursday revealed the bemusing fact that the 50 over a side one day international slated to be held between the visiting New Zealand and home (Indian) team that was originally slated to be held on October 19 has now been postponed by a day and will be held on the revised date of October 20;2016........
 According to a press release/official communique put out or then circulated by the organising cricket association at around 11 am or so on Thursday morning the same was necessitated as the Hindu festival of "Karva Chauth" ( a day when all married or yet to be married Hindu women observe a dawn to dusk fast for the longevity and well being of their legally wedded or then future husbands) was being observed/celebrated on the very same day i.e. October 19.........
 As most Delhi Police personnel will be busy ensuring the safety and security of the lakhs of women who frequent mehandi;fruit; sweetmeat;gold and silver stalls or showrooms and inundate the national capital's plethora of shopping spaces in considerable numbers this decision to postpone the originally slated match by a day was literally forced upon the host association as the Delhi Police bigwigs had expressed their inability to provide an adequate and much desired security cover to the concerned teams and thousands of spectators owing to the observance of this annual ritual that is largely observed across the northern parts of this vast country........
 Letting the cat out of the bag unwittingly and inadvertently a smart alec (DDCA official) quipped that the association was also petrified about the unsavoury fact that prospective ticket sales would dip considerably if they went ahead and held the match as scheduled on October 19.........
 Whatever may be the "real or ostensible" reason behind this 24 hour/day long postponement; the undeniable or then irrefutable fact remains that a new reason or justification has been unearthed for the postponement of a much anticipated and eagerly awaited cricket fixture by a day.......

THE TRAVAILS AND RAVAGES OF MARRIED LIFE.........

Married life or more precisely hellish and seemingly unbearable married lives more often than not end up wreaking havoc in the supposedly unremarkable and stereotyped existence of married couples........
 A 70 year old Kansas (US of A) based 70 year old gent who answers to the name of Lawrence John Ripple created more than a minor ripple in the largely nondescript lives of the fellow inhabitants of his locality when he held up the local branch of America's foremost bank for around 30 minutes or so on a typically balmy Thursday morning.......
 According to the FBI agent who led the team of FBI sleuths who apprehended the vexed and distressed senior citizen; John casually sauntered into the said bank branch a little after 10 am or so on the fateful morning and handed over a handwritten note to the bank teller demanding all the cash available in her till as he was in possession of a menacing automatic weapon and would not hesitate to fire the same if his demands were not acceded to.......
 Alarmed and consternated beyond all reasonable belief; the concerned bank teller hurriedly emptied her money chest and handed over an amount a little in excess of 75,000/- US $ to John while simultaneously setting off an automatic alarm strategically available within the confines of her cubicle.......
 Heavily armed security guards who rushed into the bank premises as soon as the alarm was set off found the supposedly armed and lethal bandit peacefully squatting on a bank bench seemingly resigned to his ultimate fate........
One of these very same security guards promptly alerted the local cops as well as the afore mentioned FBI agents who arrived on the crime scene within a few minutes and took John into their custody; on being queried why he had pulled off this seemingly mindless antic; John laconically and rather ruefully quipped that he had entered into a particularly heated; bitter and acrimonious exchange of words with his better half of 46 odd years standing and preferred to spend a considerable period of his remaining years within the forbidding and claustrophobic confines of a jail cell rather than the hell on earth his marital home had become.......
 A bemused and astonished local cop rather disbelievingly revealed the fact that the menacing and deathly weapon that John had in his possession/clutches was nothing more than a replica (Toy) of an AK 56 automatic weapon that was available at most departmental stores for a mere 5 US $ or so........ Like I said earlier hellish and tormenting marriages do indeed transform mere ,mortals into fiends from the innermost recesses of Satan's favourite inferno........

MINDLESS SAVAGERY; BUTCHERY AND MAYHEM........

Will Messrs Azam Khan; Akhilesh Yadav and their notorious acolytes wake up from their blissful and ceaseless slumber and begin smelling the coffee.........
 A hapless; defenceless and helpless eight year old girl was sexually ravaged or then defiled by her 26 year old assassin/murderer and then demonically/satanically decapitated as she guilelessly questioned his bossy and imperious ways and steadfastly refused to move out of the path of his rampaging motorcycle........
 According to the deceased's distraught; disconsolate and disbelieving father; the apple of his eye and the core of his very existence went missing at around 9:30 pm or so on the fateful Monday night from Bareilly district's Ramnagar Gotiya Village and a missing complaint was registered at an adjoining police thana at around 2:30 am or so in the wee hours of Tuesday morning after a meticulous and painstaking search for her by her alarmed and concerned family members as well as fellow villagers failed to yield any signs of her whereabouts........
 Swinging into action as soon as they registered the complaint filed by the victim's father against unknown miscreants/assailants; the police sleuths firstly constituted search parties to trace the missing girl and one of the three search parties deployed for the purpose successfully managed to recover or then find her dismembered and mutilated mortal remains from the wilderness surrounding the afore mentioned village at around 11 am or so on the fateful Tuesday morning........
 A specialised investigative team headed by a senior inspector of police then proceeded to pose questions to the dear departed girls friends and associates and one of them blurted out the fact that she had seen the said 8 year old arguing with a motor cycle borne stranger who was unknown to her........
 Arriving at the conclusion or then drawing the conclusion that the mysterious motor cycle borne gent was the one they were looking for the team of police sleuths proceeded to round up all the men who possessed or then owned motorcycles in the afore mentioned village and three other villages in close proximity to it and successfully managed to ensnare the murderer who has since been identified as 26 year old Pravesh Singh a life long resident of the same village.........
 Pravesh who was rounded up for questioning at around 7 pm or so on the event/incident filled Tuesday evening broke down under the onslaught of sustained/relentless and pointed police interrogation and chillingly revealed the sordid and beastly fact that he had gotten into a heated and acrimonious verbal altercation with the girl in question at around 10 pm or so on the murderous Monday night when she steadfastly and imperiously refused to step out of the way of his speeding motorcycle and her haughty behaviour vexed him to the extent that he landed a blow on her with such ferocity that she swooned and feel at his feet in a semi unconscious state........
 Fearing for his safety and unduly alarmed that he may be identified and unmasked; the barbaric and hedonistic gent proceeded to make his way into the confines of the dark and forbidding wilderness and then proceeded to sexually exploit the senseless eight year old and then crowned his dastardly deed by decapitating his victim with a knife that was and integral part and parcel of his murderous being.........
 He also confessed to the fact that he subsequently dug a shallow grave with his bare hands and buried his victim's disfigured mortal remains in the same in an order to obscure or then obfuscate his mindless crime of passion and unmitigated inhumanity........
 Cases have since been registered against the accused under sections 302 and 376 of the Indian Penal Code as well as all the relevant and applicable sections of the POCSO act and he was duly remanded to 14 days of judicial custody by a judicial magistrate in whose court he was produced on Wednesday afternoon........
 It is indeed high time that Messrs Akhilesh Yadav and company stop touting the much abused and oft repeated done to death cliches about political conspiracies and so and so forth and start concentrating their energies into arresting a rapidly declining law and order situation that largely resembles scenes out of bygone eras where might was right and the fittest had their way almost every time as the existing law and order machinery was a mere joke or then sorry apology/caricature of what it should have well and truly been.........

THIEVES ONE-TRAFFIC COPS ZERO........

Thieves or more precisely Aurangabad (Maharashtra) based thieves certainly seem to be getting more innovative; daring and insolent as the following incident will establish beyond all doubt.......
This ancient city based traffic constable Jalinder Jarhad got the shock of his seven odd year old professional life at around 5:30 am or so on a fateful/eventful Tuesday morning when he found that a gravel/construction material laden truck that had been seized by his Cantonment Police station compatriots a mere 24 hours or so ago had surreptitiously gone missing from the very spot where it was parked withing the said police station's precincts........
 Dismayed; alarmed; shocked and agitated beyond all reasonable belief Jarhad who had casually sauntered to the station's loo in an effort to relieve himself promptly alerted his superior officer Avinash Argav on his official mobile phone and summoned him to the spot post haste........
 Considerably taken aback by the unidentified culprits temerity and cheek; Argav reached the said police station within twenty minutes or so after being alerted about the startling developments and proceeded to constitute two teams and entrusted them with the seemingly impossible task of tracing the elusive Ashok Leyland truck as soon as humanly possible.......
 One of the two teams expressly constituted for the purpose successfully managed to trace the now empty truck (the missing truck had been divested off it's considerable load of gravel and other construction related material by the alleged assailants who has adroitly made off with it from under the very noses of the traffic cops) at a rather secluded and mostly deserted stretch of the highway connecting Aurangabad with it's neighbouring cities at around 9;30 am or so on the very same remarkable Tuesday morning........
 It is now being surmised that the owner of the truck (whose identity is yet to be established) and his loyal bunch of cohorts/acolytes might have stealthily driven/made off with the now famous and iconic truck under the cover of darkness and deserted the same after transferring the afore mentioned materials to another truck owned by the same outfit before deserting the same as it had become too hot to handle........
 Surmises/conjectures/suppositions or then outlandish guesses notwithstanding the fact remains that this merry band of thieves have indeed cocked a snook at the traffic police and shown them up to be a gaggle of bumbling; nincompoopish; blundering and blithering idiots who do not possess the professional expertise and competence to safeguard a truck seized by them and parked under their very noses in the supposedly "safe and secure" confines of a police station compound.........

RICHA CHADHA TO THE RESCUE.......

Now here is a spunky; no nonsense; gutsy; conscientious; caring and indomitable woman with whom few if any of her compatriots from the Hindi Film Industry can stand shoulder to shoulder.......
 Ms. Richa Chadha is just not an actress beyond compare but one of those rare and endangered species of human beings who always venture forth to do the right thing at the right time no matter what........
 This actress beyond compare who is known for her consummate professionalism; humility; grace; and last but not the least non starry ways was recently in Australia for a forthcoming film shoot when she happened to chance upon a fellow female in distress and a rather dire predicament........
 Richa who was indulging in one of her self confessed weaknesses i.e. wild and wanton shopping sprees happened to notice a rather menacing and mean looking gent stalking; harassing and implicitly threatening the said international clothing store manager and promptly came to her rescue without even thinking or contemplating the possible risks to her well being; safety and security........
 She decided to stick to the harangued young woman like the proverbial leech and only left the concerned spot after the shutters were pulled down for the day and the distressed and disturbed woman could safely negotiate her way back home after sharing a bite and cuppa of her favourite brew with her as Ms. Chadha ensured that she was duly escorted back home by a police officer summoned to the scene by the two concerned and perturbed women........
 Taking to twitter to express her deep rooted sense of concern; anguish and dismay; the unparalleled woman quipped that she thought that such unsavoury and distasteful incidents mostly occurred in the land of her birth but was dismayed to learn the irrefutable and undeniable fact that women all over the world without exception were at the receiving end of wannabe stalkers and tormentors unwanted and criminal attention and fancies.......
 Attagirl Richa Chadha; kudos and salutations to you for your gallantry and humanitarian spirit that comes to the fore time after time.......

ANIL KAPOOR TAKES A NOSTALGIC RIDE BACK HOME.......

Trust this evergreen actor par excellence who has been setting the benchmark for other actors to follow within the hallowed precincts of the Hindi film industry for the last three decades and more to do things with his characteristic swagger and studied nonchalance......
 One of my all time favourite actors who was shooting for a forthcoming film in Mumbai's famed and iconic "Film City" decided to make the journey back home by boarding the common man's (typical Mumbaikars) favourite mode of transportation (Mumbai's much maligned local trains) in tandem with his better half on a typically hustling and bustling Monday late evening........
Mr and Mrs. Kapoor boarded the said local train at a station in close proximity to the afore mentioned Film City and thereby reduced their typical two odd hour long road journey to a mere twenty five minutes or so thanks to the maximum city's super efficient locals.......
 Posting a series of tweets during the course of his eventful and nostalgic 25 odd long minute journey the "young at heart" Superstar posted a series of photographs of his self posing with fawning fans; ecstatic fellow Mumbaikars and last but not the least a group of policemen who could not believe either their eyes or good fortune.......
 "Lakhan" also recounted and recalled his period of struggle (period when he was trying to establish himself within the cut throat and dog eat dog industry) and vowed to travel by his chosen mode of transport far more frequently in order to keep himself grounded and in regular touch with his legions of followers and dedicated fans,,,,,,
 Needless to say that the folks who were fortunate enough to share the same space with the immortal actor are more than eagerly looking forward to an encore of this remarkable and life changing journey.........

DOING HER MARTYRED HUSBAND; HERSELF AND THE NATION PROUD........

Now here is a spunky; determined and gutsy woman after my very own heart and soul......
 Swati Mahadik; the proud and valiant widow of the gallant martyr Colonel Santosh Mahadik who succumbed to the injuries inflicted on him by a volley of shots let loose from the lethal AK 47's of a group of Pakistan trained terrorists on a deathly and sorrowful typically frosty Kupwara (Kashmir) November morning is all set to follow in her husband's noteworthy footsteps and don the famed khaki uniform......
 A suitably proud and resourceful mother of two young children Swati more than successfully cleared the mandated and stipulated SSB (Service Selection Board) examinations on September 4 and is now all set to undergo a rigorous and literally back breaking eleven month long training session at a Chennai based training centre before being posted as a junior officer in the ranks of the Indian Army.......
 Ms. Mahadik had expressed her heartfelt desire to follow in her husband's heroic wake and has more than succeeded in her quest to fulfill her late husband's unfinished agenda; mission and fondest dreams........
 " All I feel at the present moment is numbness and a sense of profound relief; there is no sense of either elation or euphoria as there is no earthly or then any other reason to celebrate as I have just taken my first tentative steps towards fulfilling my life's mission and objectives and have many more miles left to traverse".........
 " I sincerely thank the powers that be within the annals of this unparalleled and unrivaled fighting force for providing me with this god send opportunity and more specifically showing me no undue favours or favouritism other than relaxing the qualifying age norms as stipulated in the Army manual"..........
 Thirsting to don the famed khakis at the earliest Swati hopes to join the ranks of the celebrated 41st battalion of the Rashtriya Rifles (41 Rashtriya Rifles) of which her martyred husband was the commanding officer........
 Ms. Mahadik has certainly succeeded in her sterling and exemplary effort to raise the bar and set the standard for other widows of army; air force as well as navy martyrs; I for one am waiting to see how many other such similarly inclined widows emulate her and don the uniform of their choosing and ardently hope and pray that the same holds true in your case as well........

ARVIND KEJRIWAL TO UNDERGO LIFE ALTERING THROAT SURGERY.......

As if the ills perennially plaguing his fledgling political outfit were not enough of a dampener and downer; here comes the news of Aam Aadmi Party Supremo and Delhi Chief Minister Arvind Kejriwal undergoing a major throat surgery at a Bengaluru based medical facility......
 According to the doctor slated to perform the complex surgery expressly meant to alleviate Arvind's age old coughing paroxsyms and fits; the same will be performed on the morning of September 13 and the beleaguered chief minister will be reaching the concerned medical centre on the late evening of September 12......
Notwithstanding the political as well as health related pitfalls and ills besieging him at the present moment the irrepressible and indomitable Mr. Kejriwal will undertake a four day long intensive; exhaustive and literally back breaking campaign tour of the neighbouring land of five rivers (Punjab) and address a minimum of three public rallies or then impromptu gatherings a day between September 8 and 12........
 Pollsters and political pundits were predicting glad tidings for the newest political outfit/formation on the block and Arvind is undertaking this hectic campaigning trip in an effort to arrest downslide and free fall the party finds itself in subsequent to the sordid and sleazy scandal involving one of it's Delhi based cabinet ministers Sandeep Kumar.......
 He (Arvind Kejriwal) will reach Bengaluru as earlier stated on the evening of September 12 and undergo this four to five hour surgical procedure which is expected to permanently/definitely cure his cough and other throat based predilections once and for all from 8 am onwards on the fateful morning........
 Deputy Chief Minister Manish Sisodia who himself will be proceeding to Goa for a stock taking session as well as intense campaigning trip between September 7 and 11 will discharge all the chief ministerial related duties during Arvind's surgery and ten odd day long post operative convalescence.........
 My favourite political personality will return to the national capital either on the late evening of September 22 or very early morning of September 23 and proceed to decimate all his political rivals; adversaries and barking dog who is currently taking potshots at him and thereby enjoying their fifteen seconds of infame and notoriety...........

SPLITTING THE HINDI FILM INDUSTRY RIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE........

The ongoing tussle/skirmish/war of words and barbs between Messrs Ajay Devgn; Karan Johar and the perpetrator of this hideous and wholly avoidable imbroglio Kamal Rashid Khan (or KRK as he is better known) certainly seems to be splitting the rank and file of the Hindi Film Industry right down the middle.......
 One may well do well to remember the fact that this wannabe failed actor/producer/director and writer who answers to the name of KRK had stirred the proverbial hornet's nest with his supposedly lofty and utterly provocative comments about having been paid a sum of Rs. 25 lakh (according to him) by Karan Johar in order to launch a tirade against Ajay's much awaited directorial venture "Shivaay" that shares the same release date (October 28;2016) as Karan Johar's latest directorial venture "Ae Dil Hai Mushkil".......
 Ajay's close buddy; business partner and comrade in arms Kumar Mangat who somehow or the other managed to extract this explosive and highly damaging bit of news from the self appointed critic and expert who is allegedly followed by more than 1.2 million people (according to the figures available on his twitter handle as well as facebook page) and the recording of the audio clip in which KRK admits to having received the afore mentioned sum of money went viral in a matter of minutes after being posted on a plethora of social networking sites and literally coerced Mr. Devgn to demand an official enquiry by a competent and impartial investigating agency in order to establish the veracity and authenticity of KRK's outlandish and earth shattering claims.......
 Two days after this rather distasteful and disturbing controversy proliferated the annals of a Film Industry that prides itself on it's bonhomie; fraternity; brotherliness and spirit of tolerance the same seems to be splitting the same right down the middle with all and sundry taking either one side or the other in this unseemly and increasingly bizarre and nonsensical controversy.........
 Noted; highly decorated and critically acclaimed veteran film maker Prakash Jha who has directed Ajay in Gangaajal; Raajneeti; Satyagraha and such other masterpieces/blockbusters is the latest film industry icon to have openly come out in support of Ajay Devgn and pledge his unstinted and unconditional support to the intense actor/producer/director in his ongoing war against Karan Johar.........
 Jha who has never been known to either mince his words or then pull his punches took to twitter and added his inimitable two bits to this full scale flare up by urging or then motivating Ajay to continue his holy crusade against this unholy lot who have manipulated; connived; plotted; planned and contrived their way to success as Lord Shiva is steadfastly by his side in this battle of epic proportions between the truth and unholy shenanigans.......
 Will we ever hear the last of this inane and needless controversy or then will KRK continue milking the same to his advantage and keep accumulating more and more loyal and avowed followers as he has been doing ever since her instigated and engineered this never ending war; well your guess or then supposition is as good or bad as mine in this regard.......

YUVI DOES CERTAINLY RAISE MORE THAN A FEW PERTINENT POINTS/ISSUES........

Most if not all folks who read; scrutinise; peruse or then glance through the blogs that I pen under the acronym/pseudonym of "sandythevirgo" may well recall the blog that I had penned a couple of days back pertaining to the racial slur made against Yuvraj Singh's fiancee Hazel Keech.......
Refusing to let sleeping dogs lie; an infuriated; incensed and irate Yuvi who launched his own clothing line; brand; franchise; label; at a glittering ceremony in a New Delhi based five star hotel on September 4 not only deliberated on the unsavoury episode at length but also publicly announced his intentions of setting such racist and demeaning matters once and for all.......
 "Is it Hazel's fault that she happens to be an amalgam of two differing religions or cultures (Hindu and Christian) purely due to an accident of birth; I for one am still trying to figure out why the concerned agent at the Jaipur branch of Western Union Money Transfer brought her religious origins into a simple and basic monetary transaction" he thundered.........
 Continuing his tirade; the pied piper of Punjab acerbically remarked that he always thought that the primary if not solitary job of all the above mentioned Money Transfer company's outlets was to facilitate monetary transactions between the two concerned parties (the sender and the receiver) provided the receiver or beneficiary of the funds transferred or remitted produced all the relevant/pertinent and required documents to prove his/her credentials or bonafides..........
 "Why drag one's religion or such matters pertaining to one's racial origins into a rudimentary and elementary monetary transaction between two concerned and consenting parties; he queried and vowed that he would not let this matter end here as he would escalate the same to the concerned authorities and ensure that the racist and discriminatory agents representing Western Union Money Transfer in India were taught a much required and desired lesson in elementary manners; religious sensibilities; humility; grace and socially acceptable behaviours and mannerisms"; Yuvi ominously and determinedly concluded.......
 I for one am more than willing to contribute my mite to Yuvi's crusade against these detestable; deplorable; demonic and despicable racist tendencies and behaviours that have no place whatsoever in a civilised and ancient society that taught the entire world most if not all of whatever it knows today........

ALCOHOL SURELY BRINGS OUT THE BEAST IN US.........

Alcohol or then the so called elixir of life (according to the tipplers union of the world) unfailingly brings the beast in us to the fore whenever we let it get the better of our rational abilities....... In a gory; bizarre; satanic; repugnant and repulsive incident a 40 year old lifelong resident of Rajasthan's Baran District bludgeoned and pommeled his 70 year old hapless and defenceless mother to death as she showed the gall and gumption to refuse him the much desired sum of money that would quench his insatiable thirst for his favourite tipple.......
 According to shell shocked; disbelieving and distraught fellow residents and neighbours; this macabre incident took place a little after 11:30 pm or so on the fateful Friday night when Murari Sahariya (the accused) who had already extorted a couple of hundred rupees from his rather impoverished and less than prosperous mother staggered home after imbibing more than his due fill of the poison of his choice and demanded that she part with a couple of hundred rupees more so that he could imbibe or then slurp up some more of the same......
 Jankibai Sahariya (the now deceased mother/victim) who was utterly fed up and revolted by her only son's/offspring's errant and devilish ways steadfastly refused to meet his incessant and constantly growing demands for the little money that she had left at her disposal which infuriated and exasperated Murari to the extent that he picked up a stout stick/lathi that was lying in close proximity and proceeded to vent his ire on his hapless mother till she lay in a lifeless heap at his feet in an increasingly spreading pool of her own blood........
Startled and alarmed neighbours who were panic stricken to begin with on hearing the dying Jankibai's plaintive and piteous fast receding cries for help successfully managed to subdue the murderous Murari and handed him over to the police sleuths who arrived at the crime scene within 20 minutes or so after being summoned.......
 Jankibai's final rites were performed by her emotionally wracked and inconsolable daughter-in-law and grandchildren late on Saturday evening in the presence of relatives and fellow residents of the locality after her mortal remains were handed over to them after the due completion of all the legal formalities while a now sober and supposedly sane Murari is confronting the rather bleak and desolate prospects of spending the next 15 years or so within the claustrophobic confines of a dark; forbidding and desultory prison cell to which he has been confined by a judicial magistrate before whom he was produced early on Saturday morning.......
 Like I said or surmised earlier; liquor in any and every form unerringly brings out the bestiality and beastliness in us time without end unless we possess the wherewithal and sagacity to subdue us and let sanity prevail over all else........

CLASH OF THE TITANS.......

Well; well here is surely a coming together or then creative collaboration of two perfectionists and iconoclasts who have set the silver screen alight with their incomparable histrionics for the last four decades and more.......
 If the Hindi film industry buzz or clamour is to be believed Messrs Amitabh Bachchan the greatest actor to straddle planet earth and actor par excellence who sends the fawning audiences into raptures of delight with every on screen portrayal Aamir Khan are all set to combine their formidable talents and creative forces in Yashraj Films forthcoming release "Thug"........
 While Aamir was rather guarded in his response and neither confirmed or denied the news about this long overdue coming together of two of the greatest ever actors; the big B let the cat out of the bag with his gushing and enthusiastic tweets about this impending release that is already being touted as the movie event of the year 2017........
 Vijay Krishna Acharya (Victor) of "Dhoom 3" fame will don the director's mantle and has already readied a script that has set the Big B's creative juices into overdrive and whetted his insatiable appetite for that one role that will be his epitaph and crowning glory when her draws in his very last breath......

WHEN WILL WE EVER LEARN........

Fellow Indians who continue to persist with their deplorable; despicable;reprehensible and highly condemnable tendency of bringing highly toxic and hazardous plaster of Paris idols of the beloved "elephant god" home despite dire predilections to the contrary surely need a lesson from these 320 students who have set an exemplary and much needed example for all their fellow countrymen and women to follow.......
 Deeply concerned; perturbed; alarmed and disturbed by the alarmingly rising water; air; and other environmental pollution in the city of their birth (Aurangabad) during the rapidly approaching festive season; more than 320 municipal school students more than willingly and enthusiastically participated in a three day workshop organised at the city's iconic Priyadarashini Municipal School during which they handcrafted eco friendly and completely non toxic idols of Lord Ganesha that will anoint their respective homes for the ten odd days during which the festive fervour surrounding Ganesh Chaturthi persists.......
 Pointing out the relevance; topicality and timeliness of this rather unique and a first of it's kind initiative; Sanjeev Sonar the school's humble and ubiquitous head master succinctly remarked that more than 320 students between the ages of 12 and 15 more than euphorically participated in this exercise closely monitored and mentored by a master craftsman who more than willingly shared his masterly expertise with the students who carted home intrinsically carved traditional paint and toxin free Ganesha idols that would dissolve in the city's highly polluted and much abused water bodies (in a mere matter of a few minutes) that are reeling under the effects of the atrocities meted out to them in the name of religion and religious activities........
 What makes these idols or then should I say manifestations of creativity and deep rooted concern for the environment is the indisputable and incontrovertible fact that these objects of desire are completely environment friendly and if anything considerably reduce the existing pollution and toxicity of the numerable water bodies that dot the expanse of this historical and antiquated city........
 One only hopes and prays that callous; indifferent and criminally inclined fellow Indians who have made environmental degradation and deformity the only purpose of their demonic existence on planet earth take a leaf out of these environmental warriors and start emulating them if they care about the plight of the future generations and the kind of planet they bequeath to the future generations.........

ANY OTHERS FORTHCOMING "GAU RAKSHAKS" AND THE LIKES.......

What do the self appointed; anointed; crowned and styled so called "Gau Rakshaks" and their militant brethren who have become a law unto themselves have to say about this deeply painful and heart rending development.......
 A group of veterinarians who performed a timely life saving surgery on a heavily pregnant and critically ill cow at the Ahmedabad based Jivdaya Charitable Trust's animal/bovine operation theatre on a typically overcast and gloomy Friday afternoon were shocked beyond words when they found more than 100 kilograms of highly toxic waste including iron nails/filings/plastic waste with a thickness less than the prescribed 40 microns and last but not the least discarded socks and other vestments deeply ensconced or then embedded in it's abdominal cavity........
 Karthik Shastri; the chief trustee of the above mentioned charitable trust who is still recovering from the deeply disturbing; perturbing and poignant sight threw further light on the entire episode by confirming the fact that the cow was rushed into their "free" medical facility at around 11 am or so on that fateful morning by a Sabarmati based gentleman who found her in an extremely distressed and life threatening condition on a bustling street.......
 The doctors on duty at the time surmised that the cow was heavily pregnant; distressed and would not survive for too much longer unless a life saving surgery was performed on her and her calf extricated from her womb as the positioning of her unborn calf was largely responsible for her rather worrisome predicament.......
These seasoned and world weary kindred souls who had performed an umpteen number of such life saving surgical procedures over the last decade and a half were however astounded and shocked beyond belief when more than three bucketfuls of toxic and highly poisonous waste materials literally burst out of the said cow's abdomen as soon as they made a few incisions in the same.......
 Heatedly and acerbically pointing out that the mind boggling amount of waste materials uncovered or rather found in the stomach of the cow would certainly constitute some kind of dubious record as the maximum amount of wastes extricated from a cow in the past stood at a rather modest and trivial forty odd kilograms: Shastri pointedly remarked that the mindless and demonic antics of these so called Gau Rakshaks who had become a law unto themselves only highlighted or manifested their criminal tendencies; utter disdain for the welfare of their so called "Matas" and asked them to devote themselves to the selfless service of all such cows who were disdainfully discarded or then cast aside by their owners who only remembered them at ,milching time as the milk extracted from the udders of these hapless and largely starving bovines were the key to their economic prosperity and health.......
 Any answers forthcoming Messrs Gau Rakshaks; it is high time you got your act right and selflessly and nobly dedicated themselves to the service of their so called "mothers" and thereby proved their worthiness as "sons of some substance" and meaning.........

RACIST TENDENCIES TO THE FORE........

Racial discrimination and Western Union Money Transfer do indeed make for strange bedfellows but the twain did certainly blissfully co-exist when the "pied piper of Punjab" Yuvraj Singh's fiancee Hazel Keech casually sauntered into one of their Jaipur based franchises a few days back in order to withdraw some money that was remitted to her from a foreign land......
To her utter disbelief and consternation Hazel who wandered into the said money exchange outlet on a typically rainy Tuesday morning was more than outraged and piqued when the agent manning the counter rather disdainfully and haughtily refused to entertain her request of withdrawing the funds available as her name did not sound "Hindu" enough......
 Not one to take the slight in her stride the indomitable and irrepressible Ms. Keech firstly proceeded to withdraw the said amount from a second outlet/agent who did not display similarly deplorable and detestable racist tendencies and then took to twitter in order to highlight the deplorable and despicable racist tendencies exhibited by the Western Union authorities and demanded an unconditional and unqualified apology from them which she duly received within six hours or so of expressing her ire and sense of outrage at being treated in this highly condescending and callous manner......
 Keeping in view the long term ramifications of the uncalled for actions of their franchise outlet the higher ups in the annals of the money exchange and remittance set up not only made a furtive and rather comic effort at trying to cover their asses/backsides but also went on to institute/order an official and time bound enquiry into the unsavoury episode that left it with egg all over it's allegedly fair and besmirched visage.......
 Is a lame duck and false ringing apology and stereotypical official enquiry in which the accused don the triple roles of judge; jury and prosecutor in a meaningless effort to prosecute one of their very own punishment enough for a racist slight; well I will leave each one of you to draw your very own conclusions on this rather vexing and highly disturbing/emotive issue that once again brings our latent and largely hidden racist tendencies to the fore.......

TROLLERS BEWARE Ms. LANGER IS ON THE PROWL........

Here is one feisty; furious; frenzied and frenetic feline who believes in returning whatever she receives with renewed or then enhanced interest......
 Mayanti Binny Langer : India's most celebrated and easily identifiable female sports anchor who happens to be blissfully married to team India all rounder Stuart Binny for the last six odd years or so found herself at the receiving end of twitter trollers barbs and acerbic comments after her husband was plundered for 32 runs in the solitary over he delivered during the course of the recent T 20 international held between the West Indies and India in the US of A.......
 Most die hard cricket fans who witnessed that match may well remember the rather distasteful fact that a rampaging Evin Lewis who notched up his maiden T 20 ton off an astounding 48 deliveries carted a hapless and bewildered Binny to all parts of the ground for five gargantuan sixes and ended the savagery on a merciful end by just scoring a single off the final ball of the seven ball over that also included a no ball........
 Mayanti who was strategically stationed in the telecaster's studio in the august company of former Indian cricketers VVS Laxman and Deep Dasgupta as she was anchoring the pre; mid innings and post game shows/analysis; soon found herself to be the butt of ridicule and mockery of a plethora of trollers who even went to the extent of threatening to commit suicide as Binny's less than exemplary bowling exploits had ended up costing team India the match in their biased, prejudiced and jaundiced opinion.......
 A few of them also handed or then meted out the sage advice that she amicably part ways with her beloved husband as her feline charms and allure were allegedly distracting and diverting her hubby's attention from his cricket and thereby costing his team almost every match he featured or then participated in.......
 Having reached the end of her tether and having run out of patience and fortitude; the stormy petrel (Ms. Mayanti Langer) firstly asked them to contemplate or then consider the rather pitiful and heart rending plight of their families and loved one's if they indeed went ahead with their intended plans of ending their unremarkable and meaningless existence and even thanked them for their unsolicited and unwarranted advice that was the last thing the couple required as they had the sagacity and wisdom to decide the future course of their lives on their own.......
 My only advice to these self appointed/anointed and ordained armchair critics is to grow up and get a life of their very own instead off feeding off the life of others as their nocturnal and nonsensical tendencies only exemplify their desperation and crying need for enjoying their dubious fifteen seconds of fame under the sun any which way they can........